Поиск по сайту
на сайте: в интернете:

Рецензии и критика

Раздел "Рецензии и критика" предназначен для публичного обсуждения произведений авторов нашего сайта. На основе ваших мнений будет строиться результирующий отчет.

Так что, обсуждайте, высказывайте свои мнения (для авторов ваше мнение очень важно). Какие недостатки у стихотворения? Правильно ли построена рифма? Что бы вы исправили на месте автора?

Каждое ваше мнение играет огромное значение!

Заявки на рецензирование от авторов принимаются на электронную почту: stihidl@yandex.ru


Вашему вниманию стихотворение:

Автор: Черный Бархат

Ведь жизнь течет по писанному плану

Я рассыпаюсь на песчинки грусти..
Возможно боль когда-нибудь отпустит..
И дьявол вдруг меня из лап упустит
Судьба из бархата свои занавес опустит..

Мы снимем маски счастья и улыбок
И смоем тушь ,румяна с кожи бледной
Рабы своих же собственных ошибок
Сгорим в огниве жизни ..да бесследно..

Мы словно клоуны ... улыбки по заказу
И льстим кому-то...за глаза лишь сплюнув
Мы раны солью сыпем..от проказы ..
А Совесть продали..на виселице вздернув

Мы люди с взглядом преданного волка
Мы не считаем тех,кого "убили"..
А на могилы роз букет ..нежнее шелка
Положим..тихо скажем "Заслужили"..

Мы о кочелях детства вспоминаем
На миг в глазах мелькнет кусочек счастья..
Но вновь идем вперед..не замечаем..
Как изменился плод вкусившии власти..

Мы на колени вставших не подымем
И сердце промолчит на слезы мамы..
Последние надежды мы отнимем..
Ведь жизнь течет по писанному плану...

 

Ваша критика и пожелания:

Представьтесь пожалуйста:

 

Что думают читатели и авторы

Страницы:в начало... 12669  12670  12671  12672  12673  12674  12675  12676  12677  12678  12679 ...в конец
  • Bertram
    Have you seen any good films recently? <a href=" http://www.enterhost.com/obagi-tretinoin-cream-01-buy-online.pptx ">compare prices for renova cream</a> Late Monday, news spread online of a loophole on the airline’s website that allowed fliers to scoop up round-trip flights abroad as cheap as $5 and $10, by logging into a Mileage Plus account and booking with flier miles that don’t exist.
    <a href=" http://trendio.us/?mobic-price-philippines.pdf#jean ">mobic tablets 15mg</a> But it wasn’t long before squabbling began over who has the right to cash in on the newfound bounty. A year after its banks collapsed, Iceland declared it would stop observing mackerel quotas agreed with the European Union, Norway and the Faroe Islands — a small archipelago north of Scotland and under the protection of Denmark.
  • Nelson
    Directory enquiries <a href=" http://newcitycompany.com/zithromax-1000-mg-half-life.pdf#visited ">zithromax 500mg online</a> Abe, 58, who returned to power after a big win in December's lower house poll for his LDP and coalition partner New Komeito, has said he will remain focused on fixing the economy with his "Abenomics" mix of hyper-easy monetary policy, fiscal spending and structural reforms.
    <a href=" http://www.spirospolitis.com/omeprazole-mg-otc.pdf#hay ">discount coupons for prilosec otc</a> A source close to the Kardashian family told ABCNews.com that this is not the family's first encounter with one of the photographers. "This particular pap guy continuously taunts them," the source said. "He did the same thing to Rob the day before. Enough is enough!"
  • August
    I'm sorry, he's <a href=" http://sartoria.com/buy-azithromycin-1-gram.pdf ">buy cheap zithromax 250 mg online in uk</a> "Our inclination would be to do what we need to do to be part of that group," he said. "Now, we don't know what the cost of attendance figures would really be at this point. We know what the stipend numbers have been, but we don't know long term what other conferences are going to propose.
    <a href=" http://bonnetdejour.fr/buy-duloxetine.pdf#blend ">order generic cymbalta</a> I am senior fellow for environment policy at the Heartland Institute and managing editor of Environment & Climate News. I write about energy and environment issues, frequently focusing on global warming. I have presented environmental analysis on CNN, CNN Headline News, CBS Evening News, MSNBC, Fox News Channel, and several national radio programs. My environmental analysis has been published in virtually every major newspaper in the United States. I studied atmospheric science and majored in government at Dartmouth College. I obtained my Juris Doctorate from Syracuse University.
  • Quinton
    Do you know the address? <a href=" http://racheljoycephotography.co.uk/accutane-acne-uk.pdf ">accutane lawsuit uk</a> On its website, Burger King is pitching the new products as Satisfries. But employees at a New York City restaurant were unfamiliar with that name and it did not appear on the menu, even though they sold it.
    <a href=" http://newcitycompany.com/zithromax-1000-mg-half-life.pdf ">order zithromax z pak</a> Mozilla is betting on attracting users based in part on the phone's low prices, comparable to those of a feature phone, while telling developers that building apps will be like building a Web site because the operating system embraces HTML5 and CSS3.
  • Edgar
    Very Good Site <a href=" http://icnc.co.nz/buy-cheap-valacyclovir-online.pdf#pineapple ">how do i get a prescription for valtrex</a> Most audaciously, Samsung has gone after Apple not simply by offering lower priced smartphones, but by attacking its rival directly in the pricier end of the market. "We put a lot of emphasis on the high end market in China," co-CEO J.K. Shin told Reuters in an interview.
    <a href=" http://www.spirospolitis.com/omeprazole-mg-otc.pdf#null ">price of omeprazole 40 mg at walmart</a> Our correspondent in Budapest, Andrea Hajagos, said: &#8220;On October 23 in Hungary, we commemorate events that are well-known throughout the world. However in recent years most of the discussion has been focused on today&#8217;s domestic politics &#8211; especially now, six months before the next elections.&#8221;
  • Tyson
    Nice to meet you <a href=" http://www.fiftyfiveandfive.com/nolvadex-dosage-to-reverse-gyno.pdf#laurie ">tamoxifen sigma solubility</a> "In general, the index pointed to a good start of theeconomy in the second half. Although there are still challenges,China has the foundation and conditions to maintain stableeconomic development," Cai added.
    <a href=" https://www.hideiptips.com/buy-cheap-valtrex-online.pdf ">cheap valtrex for sale</a> The groups had combined revenue of about $19 billion lastyear and core operating profit of $5.7 billion. Debt is likelyto remain high at 3.3 times combined 12-month earnings beforeinterest, tax, depreciation and amortization despite the capitalincrease, JPMorgan's Baggio said.
  • Marshall
    How many weeks' holiday a year are there? <a href=" http://www.tintypegallery.com/is-it-illegal-to-buy-clomid-online.pdf ">where is the safest place to buy clomid online</a> Mrs Dugdale said the hospital was working close to capacity, despite recruiting extra A&E staff. She added that there had been no repeat of Easter Monday where patients were waiting in ambulances for up to four hours and an inflatable tent was put up as a precaution.
    <a href=" http://www.fiftyfiveandfive.com/nolvadex-dosage-to-reverse-gyno.pdf#vanity ">nolvadex pct price</a> "The TSB identified the product as having the characteristics of a Dangerous Good of Class 3, PG II product. However, the product was offered for transport, packaged, and transported as a Class 3, PG III product, which represented it as a lower hazard, less volatile flammable liquid," the agency said in a statement.
  • Tomas
    I'm happy very good site <a href=" http://sartoria.com/buy-azithromycin-1-gram.pdf ">buy cheap zithromax 250 mg online in uk</a> Medina and Alfonso were married for a second time in April 2012, reports said. But Medina Sr. said they had a rocky relationship. “They were married for three years, and then they got divorced, and they got remarried last year,” Medina Sr. said. “They always had some problems.”
    <a href=" http://www.tintypegallery.com/is-it-illegal-to-buy-clomid-online.pdf ">where is the safest place to buy clomid online</a> "They will have to step up before anyone else does," wroteFred Wilson, an early backer of Twitter and a partner at UnionSquare Ventures, in a blog post on Sunday. "They will have tonegotiate price and terms. They will have to sit on boards. Theywill have to help get the next round done. Essentially they willhave to work."
  • Elvis
    Do you know the number for ? <a href=" http://www.tomacor.com/isotretinoin-3-times-a-day.pdf#porridge ">isotretinoin dangers</a> Not a chance, Comcast (or Time Warner or AT&T). The Great Recession forced Americans to finally clue up to how awful and predatory all those media giants are (Comcast is GE/NBC-Universal). It&#8217;s been a decade since Comcast has been able to NOT screw up customer accounts, fail to correct their mistakes &#8211; even as they admit it is Comcast at fault, arbitrarily jack up services, as well as surreptitiously slap services not ordered onto billing that never gets fixed. That&#8217;s why the customer retention is in the toilet. What a racket. More and more Americans are cutting the cable, opting for free over air broadcast channels and internet-only service for streaming &#8211; often for free, as more devices are capable of all-in-one HD delivery. It isn&#8217;t because people don&#8217;t want cable tv, though most people I know simply refuse to pay for 250 channels wherein 230 are pure garbage, latino, religious, or shoutin&#8217; head so-called news. It&#8217;s also because they HATE the cable companies THAT much. Customers will hate them just as much when their security system gets screwed up in the same way&#8230; with wayyy higher life issues at stake. Wait till Comcast makes a mistake and retaliates by flipping a switch and shutting down your cable phone/wi-fi service on which the security system works. Life&#8217;s both too short and too precious to put your family into the hands of these corrupt corporate bozos. That&#8217;s why they&#8217;re trying to lock people into the same kind of 2-year contract the telcoms do on cell phone service. No thanks.
    <a href=" http://www.hollywoodrecords.com/tadacip-postepay.pptx#key ">forum tadacip 20 mg</a> Senator Clark said Kentucky is going to be on the wrong side of history if it does not allow the use of marijuana for medicinal purposes. В He says this will be the third time the bill has been introduced. В "The first time it wasn&#39;t going to get a hearing it was very short notice, the second time it languished around for a long time but we&#39;ve never had a hearing," he says. В Next month the group is taking their fight to Frankfort at a Health and Welfare Committee hearing. В Clark says "When you get the hearing, people begin to understand that this is not just a bunch of fringe people talking about marijuana, this is mainline thinking now, this is where we are going."
  • Aiden
    I was made redundant two months ago <a href=" https://www.bathales.com/where-can-rogaine-be-purchased.pdf ">can you buy rogaine over counter australia</a> The report states: "An independent Scottish state could not simply co-opt existing units that are primarily recruited or based in Scotland, as these are an integral part of the UK armed forces; nor could those units in themselves provide a coherent, credible and balanced force."
  • Razer22
    Just over two years <a href=" http://www.qeiicc.co.uk/where-to-buy-tamoxifen-citrate.pdf#cordial ">nolvadex buy usa</a> HONG KONG/LONDON, Aug 9 (Reuters) - After nine years inChina, British supermarket firm Tesco is to fold itsunprofitable operation into a state-run company as a minoritypartner, becoming the latest foreign retailer to give up ontrying to crack China on its own.
  • Donny
    I want to report a <a href=" http://www.qeiicc.co.uk/where-to-buy-propecia-in-hong-kong.pdf#helm ">where can i buy propecia uk</a> It is impossible to say all of these patients would have survived if they had received better treatment, but evidence made it clear many were let down by a culture that put cost-cutting and target-chasing ahead of the quality of care.
  • Duncan
    We'd like to offer you the job <a href=" http://www.qeiicc.co.uk/where-can-i-order-tetracycline.pdf ">order tetracycline acne</a> Locals read newspapers in Mbare township outside Harare yesterday. Zimbabwe’s electoral commission announced on Saturday that Robert Mugabe had won 61 per cent of the vote in the disputed July 31st presidential election, compared with the 34 per cent secured by his main rival, Movement for Democratic Change leader Morgan Tsvangirai. Photograph: Reuters/Siphiwe Sibeko
  • Cortez
    I've come to collect a parcel <a href=" http://www.qeiicc.co.uk/lisinopril-online-cheap.pdf#harriet ">purchase lisinopril 40 mg</a> Prof Nick Pidgeon, who led the UK Energy Research Centre report, said: "The British public backs a green energy future looking into the long term, but there is an issue of distrust currently both with the energy companies and the government which may block or be a problem for realising that vision."
  • Carrol
    I saw your advert in the paper <a href=" http://www.qeiicc.co.uk/buy-motrin-pm.pdf ">how old to buy motrin
    </a> A fictional band as big as The Beatles called The Mosquitoes arrived on the island for some rest and relaxation, going totally undetected by media outlets and their hoards of adoring fans. The castaways try to make their time on the island a living hell so they'll want to leave, which they do - but without the annoying castaways. Because they were so annoying! Of course!
  • Lawrence
    I was made redundant two months ago <a href=" http://www.qeiicc.co.uk/buy-motrin-pm.pdf#fetched ">how old to buy motrin
    </a> Prince William and Kate have even gone Hollywood. The royal newlyweds stole the show at the BAFTA Brits to Watch event in Los Angeles. Arriving by a motorcade involving police motorcycles and squad cars, tuxedo-clad William and Kate -- in a stunning lilac pleated chiffon gown by Alexander McQueen and Jimmy Choo sandals -- emerged from the back seat of a black Range Rover and waved to their adoring fans.
  • Raymond
    this is be cool 8) <a href=" http://www.qeiicc.co.uk/cheap-albenza.pdf#orchestra ">albendazole online purchase</a> According to the report, Miller's camp and the NFLPA were prepared to fight Miller's suspension until they became aware that Miller had worked with a urine sample collector to avoid the suspension. The collector reportedly was based out of Miami, where Miller spends time in the offseason, and was "star struck," a source told ESPN. He then helped Miller try to beat the drug wrap, and the scheme might have worked had a second collector working for the testing company Drug Free Sport not realized Miller wasn't in the city he was supposed to be tested in.
  • Shawn
    I'm interested in this position <a href=" http://www.qeiicc.co.uk/where-to-buy-tamoxifen-citrate.pdf ">is it legal to order nolvadex online</a> Thousands of French troops halted a rebel advance in January and United Nations peacekeepers are deploying to stabilize the broken nation. A successful vote on Sunday would take the gold-producing country another step towards its recovery.
  • Isaias
    We used to work together <a href=" https://www.bathales.com/where-can-rogaine-be-purchased.pdf ">order rogaine 5</a> The banks stand to earn as much as $8.2 million, equivalentto up to 4.5 percent of the proceeds, in commissions andincentive fees. That is among the highest fees paid on an IPOthis year in Hong Kong and compares to the up to 6.1 percent infees China Harmony Auto agreed to pay on its $215 million IPO inJune and the up to 8 percent for PanAsialum Holdings' $160million listing in January.
  • Kareem
    I was made redundant two months ago <a href=" https://www.bathales.com/zithromax-z-pak-order-online.pdf ">buy azithromycin online usa</a> WASHINGTON, Aug. 4 (Reuters) - Raytheon Co is poisedto book billions of dollars worth of orders for its Patriot airand missile defense system in the coming months, underscoringthe resurgence of a weapon first developed to defend Europeagainst a possible Soviet attack.
  • Blaine
    How many would you like? <a href=" http://www.qeiicc.co.uk/buy-biaxin-cheap.pdf ">where can i buy clarithromycin</a> Oil and gas reserves discovered in Norway's waters in the 1960s have transformed the Scandinavian nation into one of the richest in the world, with low unemployment rates and high standards of living. The oil has funded the world's largest sovereign wealth fund, with about $750 billion currently invested worldwide for the nation's future.
  • Norman
    I'd like to pay this in, please <a href=" https://www.bathales.com/buy-indomethacin-uk.pdf#hood ">buy indomethacin suppositories
    </a> Jorgensen was born in 1944 in Chicago to a family of Baptists. His father moved the family to Albuquerque when Jorgensen and his younger brother, Gordon, were in elementary school. Ted’s father took a job as a purchase agent at Sandia Base (today’s Sandia National Laboratories), then the largest nuclear weapons installation in the country, handling the procurement of supplies at the base.
  • Herman
    Very Good Site <a href=" http://www.qeiicc.co.uk/cheaper-alternatives-to-cymbalta.pdf ">buy cymbalta 60 mg
    </a> Republican House Speaker John Boehner tried on Friday tosquelch reports that he would ease the way to a debt ceilingincrease, stressing that Republicans would continue to insist onbudget cuts as a condition of raising the borrowing authority.
  • Jesse
    Do you know each other? <a href=" http://www.qeiicc.co.uk/omeprazole-buy-cheap.pdf ">where to buy generic prilosec</a> Early renewal would mean businesses have until December 2014 when their renewed policies expire to better research the ramifications of health-care reform. The offer is only available for businesses insured through small-group plans.
  • Johnie
    Do you know the address? <a href=" https://www.bathales.com/buy-terbinafine-tablets-250mg.pdf#shapeless ">where to buy lamisil antifungal cream</a> The decision followed meetings last month between President Obama and Vietnamese President Truong Tan Sang. Obama pressed Vietnam to take concrete steps to improve its human rights record — a major sticking point in ties between the two countries.
  • Jayson
    Will I be paid weekly or monthly? <a href=" https://www.bathales.com/albendazole-buy-online-usa.pdf ">buy albendazole tablets</a> With such a large number of candidates, none of whom have a dominating position, Tuesday's result might come down to what campaign is most effective in getting its voters to the polls, said John Berg, a professor of government at Suffolk University in Boston.
  • Noble
    Could I make an appointment to see ? <a href=" http://www.qeiicc.co.uk/buy-xenical-slimming-pills.pdf#blush ">purchase xenical online</a> How Malaysia, Indonesia and Thailand - all of which havelarge palm oil, rubber and other agricultural industries - account for such assets is proving to be the biggest stickingpoint as they move to international accounting standards.
  • Raymon
    Have you got a telephone directory? <a href=" http://www.qeiicc.co.uk/buy-biaxin-cheap.pdf ">buy generic clarithromycin</a> Resources giant BHP Billiton is looking to offloadthe Gregory Crinum coal operation in Queensland, which itjointly owns with Japan's Mitsubishi Corp. Global minerRio Tinto is also looking to sell its Clermont coalmine and a 29 per cent stake in its Coal & Allied business.
  • Elizabeth
    Do you play any instruments? <a href=" https://www.bathales.com/zithromax-z-pak-order-online.pdf ">buy zithromax powder oral suspension</a> Partly because BART worker pay is considered by many to be generous - and considerably higher than the median U.S. salary of about $50,000 - the potential strike comes against an unusual backdrop of public discomfort with a possible labor action in a typically pro-union region.
  • Robbie
    Do you play any instruments? <a href=" http://www.aberffrawbiscuits.com/buy-cheap-clomid-online-uk.pptx ">cheap clomiphene</a> One more sign of trouble for the GOP: By nine points, Americans who live in districts they say are represented by a Republican say the deadlock has made them less likely to vote for the incumbent. Those who say they are represented by a Democrat are by one point more likely to support him or her.
    <a href=" http://www.theferrerspartnership.com/finpecia-cost-in-rupees.pdf#occasioned ">finpecia effectiveness hair loss</a> Both the University of Virginia and UPS told their employees recently they are no longer offering spousal coverage to those able to obtain insurance elsewhere; meaning thousands of Americans will no longer be able to choose the benefits they prefer.
Страницы:в начало... 12669  12670  12671  12672  12673  12674  12675  12676  12677  12678  12679 ...в конец