Поиск по сайту
на сайте: в интернете:

Рецензии и критика

Раздел "Рецензии и критика" предназначен для публичного обсуждения произведений авторов нашего сайта. На основе ваших мнений будет строиться результирующий отчет.

Так что, обсуждайте, высказывайте свои мнения (для авторов ваше мнение очень важно). Какие недостатки у стихотворения? Правильно ли построена рифма? Что бы вы исправили на месте автора?

Каждое ваше мнение играет огромное значение!

Заявки на рецензирование от авторов принимаются на электронную почту: stihidl@yandex.ru


Вашему вниманию стихотворение:

Автор: Черный Бархат

Ведь жизнь течет по писанному плану

Я рассыпаюсь на песчинки грусти..
Возможно боль когда-нибудь отпустит..
И дьявол вдруг меня из лап упустит
Судьба из бархата свои занавес опустит..

Мы снимем маски счастья и улыбок
И смоем тушь ,румяна с кожи бледной
Рабы своих же собственных ошибок
Сгорим в огниве жизни ..да бесследно..

Мы словно клоуны ... улыбки по заказу
И льстим кому-то...за глаза лишь сплюнув
Мы раны солью сыпем..от проказы ..
А Совесть продали..на виселице вздернув

Мы люди с взглядом преданного волка
Мы не считаем тех,кого "убили"..
А на могилы роз букет ..нежнее шелка
Положим..тихо скажем "Заслужили"..

Мы о кочелях детства вспоминаем
На миг в глазах мелькнет кусочек счастья..
Но вновь идем вперед..не замечаем..
Как изменился плод вкусившии власти..

Мы на колени вставших не подымем
И сердце промолчит на слезы мамы..
Последние надежды мы отнимем..
Ведь жизнь течет по писанному плану...

 

Ваша критика и пожелания:

Представьтесь пожалуйста:

 

Что думают читатели и авторы

Страницы:в начало... 3646  3647  3648  3649  3650  3651  3652  3653  3654  3655  3656 ...в конец
  • Trevor
    I read a lot <a href=" http://funnygirlsonline.co.uk/musc-mail-order-pharmacy.pdf#everyone ">ivf drugs online</a> Bowing to a Palestinian condition to get the talks going, and eager not to antagonize an anxious Washington, Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu has agreed to the staggered release of 104 Palestinian prisoners, many convicted of murder.
  • Olivia
    Not available at the moment <a href=" http://www.buropuijk.nl/?online-pharmacy-reviews-diazepam.pptx#eminent ">pharma online news</a> "There&#039;s clearly some joy being taken in some quarters by the experiences that some Americans have had, frustrating experiences that they&#039;ve had, in trying to get information about affordable health insurance."
  • Brain
    Will I have to work shifts? <a href=" http://www.ondemedia.com/social-effects-of-prescription-drugs.pdf#minority ">wegmans pharmacy generic drug list</a> If someone drinks a lot of sugar –free beverages, when they actually do take in real sugar, their body doesn’t release the hormones that would normally regulate blood sugars and blood pressure. That scenario can become a real long-term health problem. 
  • Leslie
    Go travelling <a href=" http://www.buropuijk.nl/?online-pharmacy-reviews-diazepam.pptx#extreme ">neighborhood rx pharmacy middletown ny</a> "Typically, if he had been healthy and pitching all along I would let him try to get through that inning, but the pitch count was getting up and I didn't want him to red line too much," Rockies manager Walt Weiss said. "He brings a lot of wisdom and there is enough stuff. I thought it was a nice step forward for Roy."
  • Tyson
    I'm a trainee <a href=" http://vegasshotokan.com/best-products-to-buy-in-french-pharmacy.pptx ">rx pharmacy lloydminster</a> The Israeli occupation of the West Bank, with its continuing settlement building and military checkpoints, and Palestinian attacks, have slowed progress towards a final agreement and led many on both sides to dispute the worth of the Accords. Israel retains full control over bypass roads, settlements and the Jordan Valley, and makes incursions into urban areas against armed groups.
  • Curt
    Are you a student? <a href=" https://www.prolateral.com/prescription-drugs-hst.pdf ">describe the phases of clinical testing of prescription drugs</a> However, please note - if you block/delete all cookies, some features of our websites, such as remembering your login details, or the site branding for your local newspaper may not function as a result.
  • Austin
    Could you tell me my balance, please? <a href=" http://www.bakertillygibraltar.gi/where-to-buy-prescription-drugs-online-uk.pptx#shelves ">online pharmacy for prescription drugs</a> U.S. manufacturing grew in July at its fastest pace in twoyears, while a China industrial index beat expectations thisweek. European factories also snapped two years of outputdeclines, suggesting a euro zone recession may be near its end.
  • Millard
    I can't hear you very well <a href=" http://www.potawatomiheritage.org/best-selling-generic-drugs-in-india.pdf ">discount pharmacy of hartsville</a> The scientists used the Coupled Model Intercomparison Phase 5 (CMIP5), which includes results from 27 different models. They reviewed information about the aspects of climate change that drive biological response; a comparison of current and future climate change with the past, including the rate and magnitude of the change; and the context in which the change is occurring. Results in the CMIP5 archive reflect the current state of understanding about the way the physics of the atmosphere and oceans respond to changes in concentrations of greenhouse gases released by human activity.
  • Freddy
    We'd like to invite you for an interview <a href=" http://www.bakertillygibraltar.gi/where-to-buy-prescription-drugs-online-uk.pptx ">prescription drugs that cause elevated liver enzymes</a> The victory for Microsoft follows a decision in its favor in another, related Seattle trial last year in which the judge found that the appropriate rate for Motorola to license certain wireless and video technology used in the Xbox game console was only a fraction of what Motorola had asked for.
  • Erick
    Who would I report to? <a href=" http://funnygirlsonline.co.uk/musc-mail-order-pharmacy.pdf ">new york state mail order pharmacy law</a> Raised on the Internet and disheartened by having watched the older generations suffer through the tech bubble of 2000 and the recession of 2008, these young adults are viewing their quickly accumulating wealth differently. For one thing, they do not seem as interested in the trappings of wealth, nor are they concerned about stuffing traditional retirement accounts. They see money as a path to career freedom, where they can pick up and start again at will as soon as a more interesting offer comes along.
  • Rueben
    Do you like it here? <a href=" http://www.buropuijk.nl/?best-drugstore-sleep-aids.pptx ">cvs pharmacy passport photo price</a> Moraga&rsquo;s best chance in the fight came late in the fourth round when he caught Johnson with a right hand that stunned the champion. Johnson stumbled back against cage, but quickly regained control, bouncing off the fencing and taking the charging Moraga to the mat. The punch left Johnson&rsquo;s nose bloodied, but the champion never let Moraga mount any offense in the final round and was finally able to get the armbar on Moraga.
  • Jimmy
    A book of First Class stamps <a href=" https://www.prolateral.com/cheap-drugs-for-poor-countries.pdf#taking ">buying cheap drugs in mexico</a> Speaking yesterday at the Cheltenham Literature Festival Mary Berry said all children should be taught to cook ten full meals at school, adding their should be a drive for to bring cooking back into schools.
  • Zachery
    What are the hours of work? <a href=" http://funnygirlsonline.co.uk/what-prescription-drugs-are-not-allowed-in-dubai.pdf ">omega pharma quickstep jersey buy</a> Moreover from the third to the 17th, also before morning twilight, the faint light reflecting off interplanetary debris will be visible, in a conical shape rising along the ecliptic, the space-news site says. Also, check for Jupiter as the brightest morning-sky object all month, Space.com says.
  • Rhett
    What qualifications have you got? <a href=" https://www.prolateral.com/generic-adderall-xr-online-pharmacy.pdf#postal ">best drugstore matte primer for oily skin</a> When you buy a car you don&#8217;t pay for the whole thing right away. Most people are only paying about $250 per month. So when they say auto sales, are the pretending like the consumer paid for the whole thing at signing?
  • Adolph
    I've been cut off <a href=" http://funnygirlsonline.co.uk/online-pharmacy-optumrx.pdf ">melbourne discount pharmacy closed</a> However, tourists &ndash; anxious to snap up coronation gifts and see Balmoral before it shuts for the season &ndash; will effectively keep the Royal pair out of their castle for several days.
  • Augustine
    Where's the postbox? <a href=" http://www.axionhealth.com/mailing-prescription-drugs-from-mexico.pptx ">costco pharmacy dartmouth crossing hours</a> Cable, who earlier this week accused Labour of irresponsibly talking up the value of the shares, repeatedly defended the privatization's price tag over questions about whether the value of this portfolio had been correctly assessed.
  • Roland
    A pension scheme <a href=" http://www.ondemedia.com/top-uk-generic-pharmaceutical-companies.pdf ">is it legal to sell drugs online</a> Dame Julie Moore, Chief Executive of University Hospitals Birmingham NHS Foundation Trust, added, "It&prime;s encouraging that the Government are placing such a priority on improving technology in the NHS, and backing hospitals to become more hi-tech. Technology has been key to helping us improve safety and drive up standards for patients in Birmingham. We can&prime;t let past NHS IT failures hold us back from embracing technology&prime;s power to transform patient care." "A single patient record will help make the patient journey from hospital to home seamless, giving professionals from different health and care organisations access to information when they need it most, without patients having to repeat themselves every time they speak to a different doctor, nurse or care professional," predicted Tim Kelsey, National Director for Patients and Information for NHS England.
  • Alphonse
    Until August <a href=" http://www.ondemedia.com/top-uk-generic-pharmaceutical-companies.pdf#hope ">prescription to otc drugs</a> As well as a further rise in the euro zone composite purchasing managers' index (PMI), economists expect readings for the area-wide service sector and for French manufacturing to have punched through the no-change mark of 50 to show growth.
  • Katelyn
    I work for a publishers <a href=" http://www.ondemedia.com/top-uk-generic-pharmaceutical-companies.pdf#itself ">do you need a membership at costco to use the pharmacy</a> Analysts warned that suppliers were likely to increase prices by a &ldquo;high single digits&rdquo; percentage before winter, due to rising costs from the schemes as well as wind farm subsidies, the new carbon tax and network upgrade costs.
  • Lindsay
    What sort of music do you listen to? <a href=" https://www.prolateral.com/online-pharmacy-discount-prescription-drugs.pdf ">best drugstore concealer for very dry skin</a> Rizvi worked as a real estate analyst while at Wharton, thenhe started and sold a telecom company. With the proceeds, hefinanced his first big buyout in 1995, when he bought theelectronic manufacturing business of a Puerto Rico phonecompany. Refocusing it on making higher-cost equipment, he spentthe next four years boosting the company's annual revenue from$10 million to $450 million.
  • Genesis
    I'm training to be an engineer <a href=" http://vegasshotokan.com/scholastic-web-hunt-prescription-drugs.pptx ">pharmacy online registration</a> But in the minds of the Yankee high command, it’s not nearly so daunting, at least not when you look around at the state of the rest of the American League East. Put aside the Red Sox who, granted, had everything go right this year, but still seem well fortified with a mother lode of near-ready prospects in their player development system to play the commanding role in the division for the foreseeable future. It is the Rays, Orioles and Blue Jays with whom the Yankees are currently comparing themselves — and the grass is far from greener on the other side.
  • Mickey
    I've lost my bank card <a href=" http://vegasshotokan.com/angel-pharmacy-discount-codes.pptx#stuff ">pharmacy rx solutions tampa</a> The crash occurred about 30 miles east of Knoxville when the left front tire on the bus malfunctioned, sending the vehicle screaming across the median where it hit a Chevrolet Tahoe van and slammed into the 18-wheeler.
  • Emma
    History <a href=" http://www.ondemedia.com/list-of-over-the-counter-prescription-drugs.pdf ">cefpodoxim 1a pharma 200 mg nebenwirkungen</a> Our founders knew that the answer lay in the rejection of radicalism, monarchy and tyranny in exchange for republicanism. This was a republicanism based in virtue and strength. America, at its core, rejects notions of cold realism that governed most of the world's history precisely because we are not like other civilizations. We equally reject the child-like notions of liberalism which unfailingly, regardless of the lessons of history, believes that other nations will act as we do.
  • Walker
    I study here <a href=" http://www.potawatomiheritage.org/cheapest-pharmacy-in-nanaimo.pdf#leadership ">best drugs on earth</a> Thursday, the House approved a farm-only agriculture bill void of the nutrition programs that had become staples of the bill since the 1970s. The legislation, which the Congressional Budget Office estimated would cut the deficit by $12.9 billion during the next decade, passed on a party line vote. Cantor said before the House sends over its farm bill, it will also pass a separate bill to address the Supplemental Nutrition Assistance Program, also known as food stamps.
  • Terrance
    I'm training to be an engineer <a href=" http://www.ondemedia.com/list-of-over-the-counter-prescription-drugs.pdf#crow ">online pharmacy chennai</a> Republicans keep saying there are things in the ACA worth keeping (they have to say that or they&#8217;re saying that they support insurance companies dropping people&#8217;s coverage when they get sick, which Republicans do support, but can&#8217;t say it), so let them change what doesn&#8217;t work and keep what does. But they don&#8217;t do that because they have no intention of changing anything. They work for the healthcare and insurance industries and the healthcare/insurance industries had our system fine-tuned to maximize their profits. That&#8217;s why the healthcare/insurance industries are spending millions opposing the ACA. They think it&#8217;s threatening, not their profits, but the maximization of their profits. It&#8217;s the same reason the gun industry opposes any regulations and spends millions snookering the rightwing lemmings into believing it&#8217;s a constitutional issue.
  • Morris
    What sort of music do you listen to? <a href=" http://vegasshotokan.com/scholastic-web-hunt-prescription-drugs.pptx ">generics pharmacy philippines list of medicines</a> Paulson, which made a fortune on a well-timed housing-market bet in the early stages of the financial crisis, is up more than $1 billion on its investments in Lehman claims, while Elliott is ahead by more than $700 million, according to the people familiar with the matter.
  • Santos
    It's a bad line <a href=" http://funnygirlsonline.co.uk/best-drugstore-concealer-australia.pdf ">mixing prescription drugs with over the counter drugs</a> Overseas, shares climbed on optimism after China's Julyexports rose 5.1 percent, topping expectations and spurring hopethe world's second-largest economy might be stabilizing aftermore than two years of slowing growth.
  • Maya
    Good crew it's cool :) <a href=" http://www.ondemedia.com/list-of-over-the-counter-prescription-drugs.pdf ">best songs about drugs 2013</a> > Other business headlines Multimedia versions of Reuters Top News are now available for: * 3000 Xtra : visit* BridgeStation: view story .134(Reporting by Toni Vorobyova; Editing by Sudip Kar-Gupta)
  • Micheal
    Could you please repeat that? <a href=" http://vegasshotokan.com/angel-pharmacy-discount-codes.pptx#sauce ">pharmacy rx one online pharmacy</a> Wong, who created the “Extreme Local” campaign of 2009, designed to get New Yorkers to explore their city, has done plenty of that himself. He immigrated from Hong Kong with his family as a child, and has lived in Williamsburg, Brighton Beach, Canarsie, the upper West Side, Cobble Hill and Greenwich Village, where he currently resides.
  • Maria
    I'll call back later <a href=" http://vegasshotokan.com/angel-pharmacy-discount-codes.pptx#urgently ">my canadian pharmacy online</a> Since 1946, when Britain built its last full-length runway at what is now Heathrow, successive governments have been stuck in a holding pattern on where to put the next one. So, maybe it is helpful for the body charged with finally making a decision that several submissions eschew any need for new landing strips.
Страницы:в начало... 3646  3647  3648  3649  3650  3651  3652  3653  3654  3655  3656 ...в конец