Поиск по сайту
на сайте: в интернете:

Рецензии и критика

Раздел "Рецензии и критика" предназначен для публичного обсуждения произведений авторов нашего сайта. На основе ваших мнений будет строиться результирующий отчет.

Так что, обсуждайте, высказывайте свои мнения (для авторов ваше мнение очень важно). Какие недостатки у стихотворения? Правильно ли построена рифма? Что бы вы исправили на месте автора?

Каждое ваше мнение играет огромное значение!

Заявки на рецензирование от авторов принимаются на электронную почту: stihidl@yandex.ru


Вашему вниманию стихотворение:

Автор: Черный Бархат

Ведь жизнь течет по писанному плану

Я рассыпаюсь на песчинки грусти..
Возможно боль когда-нибудь отпустит..
И дьявол вдруг меня из лап упустит
Судьба из бархата свои занавес опустит..

Мы снимем маски счастья и улыбок
И смоем тушь ,румяна с кожи бледной
Рабы своих же собственных ошибок
Сгорим в огниве жизни ..да бесследно..

Мы словно клоуны ... улыбки по заказу
И льстим кому-то...за глаза лишь сплюнув
Мы раны солью сыпем..от проказы ..
А Совесть продали..на виселице вздернув

Мы люди с взглядом преданного волка
Мы не считаем тех,кого "убили"..
А на могилы роз букет ..нежнее шелка
Положим..тихо скажем "Заслужили"..

Мы о кочелях детства вспоминаем
На миг в глазах мелькнет кусочек счастья..
Но вновь идем вперед..не замечаем..
Как изменился плод вкусившии власти..

Мы на колени вставших не подымем
И сердце промолчит на слезы мамы..
Последние надежды мы отнимем..
Ведь жизнь течет по писанному плану...

 

Ваша критика и пожелания:

Представьтесь пожалуйста:

 

Что думают читатели и авторы

Страницы:в начало... 9240  9241  9242  9243  9244  9245  9246  9247  9248  9249  9250 ...в конец
  • Tracey
    Not available at the moment http://www.bellavistaar.gov/online-buy-accutane-florida.pdf rent get accutane cheaper workshop replace In court papers filed in U.S. Bankruptcy Court in Manhattan,American's bankrupt parent, AMR Corp, said failing toapprove the restructuring would add "a destabilizing factor" toits proposal to merge with US Airways Group and pay backcreditors.
  • Leland
    Sorry, you must have the wrong number http://verulamwebdesign.co.uk/accutane-available-uk.pdf action accutane mild acne uk crawford <a href="http://ask.fm/Hannahbanana722/answer/59912149021" target="_blank"><strong>Is this really you? Can you take a spoon pic?</strong></a>"Yeah," Anderson responded
  • Filiberto
    There's a three month trial period http://www.bellavistaar.gov/buy-wellbutrin-sr-online.pdf poems cheap bupropion sr choice bust Content engaging our readers now, with additional prominence accorded if the story is rapidly gaining attention. Our WSJ algorithm comprises 30% page views, 20% Facebook, 20% Twitter, 20% email shares and 10% comments.
  • Romeo
    We went to university together http://www.bellavistaar.gov/buy-effexor-online-without-prescription.pdf solely buy effexor xr online probability These figures also reflect the party's weakness among public sector workers and ethnic minority voters. Households with both adults working in the public sector vote Labour ahead of the Conservatives by a 32-point margin, and non-whites vote Labour ahead of the Conservatives by a 52-point margin.
  • Fausto
    We'd like to invite you for an interview http://verulamwebdesign.co.uk/can-you-buy-accutane-online-uk.pdf political can a gp prescribe accutane uk inevitable pear Unfortunately, the possibility of future instability is greater than ever before. China may soon have 100 missiles capable of striking America. According to a new intelligence assessment by the U.S. Air Force, both North Korea and Iran will also have the capability of striking the U.S. with a ballistic missile by 2015. Russia is also fully modernizing its nearly 500 submarine and land based-missiles and bombers. China is doing the same with its nuclear arsenal, while building missiles at a faster rate than any other country in the world.
  • Micah
    Would you like a receipt? https://www.gtxgaming.co.uk/blog/buy-voltaren-gel-uk.pdf pug voltaren buy uk straight In this Sunday, Jan. 20, 2013 photo, a sightseeing helicopter lands near New Zealand's Scott Base on Ross Island, Antarctica. Tourism is rebounding here five years after the financial crisis stifled what had been a burgeoning industry. And it’s not just retirees watching penguins from the deck of a ship. Visitors are taking tours inland and even engaging in “adventure tourism” like skydiving and scuba diving under the ever-sunlit skies of a Southern Hemisphere summer. (AP Photo/Rod McGuirk)
  • Alden
    I'd like to send this parcel to http://verulamwebdesign.co.uk/can-you-buy-accutane-online-uk.pdf homes allow accutane procedure uk overjoyed Chrysler and Fiat currently are forced to manage theirfinances separately, even though they are run by the sameexecutive team. A full merger would make it easier - but notautomatic - to combine the cash pools of the two companies,giving Fiat more funds to expand its product lineup.
  • Charles
    It's serious http://verulamwebdesign.co.uk/buy-finasteride-uk-forum.pdf broken proscar prescription uk secondly silas There are also concerns among academics about the NDRC as aninstitution. Founded in 1952 as the State Planning Commission,it is deeply rooted in China's command economy past, even as itcrafts policies for its mostly capitalist present.
  • Sidney
    On another call http://verulamwebdesign.co.uk/atorvastatin-cost-uk.pdf tragic atorvastatin buy online uk
    intrude And earlier this month, state media announced that a high-level provincial official in Inner Mongolia was also under investigation for "serious disciplinary violations" - which is often code for corruption.
  • Emile
    I'm doing a masters in law http://verulamwebdesign.co.uk/seroquel-patient-uk.pdf infinite newsletter quetiapine overdose uk selling detached Eliot Spitzer, trying to rebound from hooker scandal in run for city controller, was blasted as a "hypocrite" in GOP letter, along with fellow disgraced Dems Anthony Weiner and Vito Lopez.
  • Fredrick
    Where's the nearest cash machine? http://verulamwebdesign.co.uk/buy-finasteride-uk-forum.pdf cure cousins buy finasteride uk forum cabin If Spanish individuals were consuming 1.0 because their wages were 1.0, but now wages are being forced to 0.8, that means consumption must go to 0.8. For (illegal) immigrants coming from places where wages are 0.5 which means consumption is 0.5, going to Spain and getting screwed in Spain might mean wages at 0.6 and consumption at 0.6, or consuming at 0.5 and sending 0.1 in remittances, with the hope of moving to wages of 0.7 and then 0.8.
  • Gregg
    I'd like to send this to http://www.bellavistaar.gov/buy-nolvadex-pct-cycle.pdf timeout buy nolvadex online uk operate surface The defence group also reiterated warnings that continuing delays in negotiating the &ldquo;Salam&rdquo; contract for 72 Saudi Typhoon jets would hit 2013 earnings per share by 6p-7p should they fail to be concluded by the year end. Analysts are currently forecasting full-year earnings of 43p a share.
  • Josef
    I really like swimming http://verulamwebdesign.co.uk/buy-finasteride-uk-forum.pdf nicer buy finasteride uk wings planet But applicants need not have a computer science degree toget lucrative jobs as long as they can do the hardest-to-filljobs such as finding bugs in software, identifying elusiveinfections and reverse engineering computer viruses that arefound on computers, said Alan Paller, founder of the non-profitSANS Institute in Washington.
  • Ezequiel
    I'll text you later https://www.gtxgaming.co.uk/blog/sumatriptan-nasal-spray-cost-uk.pdf spat imitrex injection uk county &#8220;We do note that the advertisement shown to us is from four years ago, and that we continue to make adjustments on exclusion language to ensure clarity based on feedback from our customers. We are constantly reviewing our messaging, which may vary by offer, and we strive to make sure that our customer can readily understand the nature of our promotions and that we are clear in our message as to both what is included and what is excluded. We do not wish to disappoint anyone and always aim to hold ourselves to the highest standards.&#8221;
  • Lincoln
    I've been made redundant http://www.bellavistaar.gov/buy-nolvadex-pct-cycle.pdf hate buy nolvadex online uk friend represent And “13” really does, to a nearly satiric degree. The opening track, “End of the Beginning,” has the creepy-crawly gait of the song that opened the band’s self-titled debut 43 years ago. “The first album was essentially a live album without the audience,” Osbourne says. This time “Rick wouldn’t let me do overdubs. He kept everything basic and raw.”
  • Jerrold
    I love this site http://www.bellavistaar.gov/cheapest-pharmacy-for-accutane.pdf quiz where can i buy accutane in the uk take Twitter has steadily refined its targeting capabilities and can now send promoted tweets to people based on geographic location and interests. This month, the company paid more than $300 million to acquire MoPub, which will enable it to target mobile users based on websites they have visited on their desktop computers.
  • Colin
    Will I have to work shifts? http://verulamwebdesign.co.uk/buy-finasteride-uk-forum.pdf lapse breeches buy finasteride uk calmly stair Turkey, which has the second largest army in NATO but is reluctant to act unilaterally in Syria, has also hit out at the United Nations Security Council for failing to come to a unified stance over Syria, and has called on it to take action.
  • Lemuel
    Do you need a work permit? http://www.jru.edu/order-abilify-online-canada.pdf past cheapest abilify fond logic The Pew Research Center study found that a record 21.6 million young adults -- defined as 18- to 31-year-olds -- were living in their parents' home in 2012. That 36 percent was 4 percentage points higher than those in that age range who were living with their parents in 2007, before the start of the recession, and tops the 34 percent when the recession officially ended in 2009, the report said.
  • Ricardo
    Have you got any experience? http://vcreme.edu.vn/cheap-lexapro-alternative.pdf case remainder order generic lexapro online traces Although the U.S. blood supply has been screened for West Nile disease since 2003, there have been 12 previous cases in which the West Nile virus was contracted through a blood transfusion. Primarily the disease is spread through mosquitoes, but can also be transmitted through organ donation or blood transfusions.
  • Mike
    I work here http://vcreme.edu.vn/buy-permethrin-cream-online-uk.pdf jersey where can i buy permethrin cream over the counter uk alone The insurer might increase its investments in real estate,private-equity funds and wind parks to 80 billion euros ($109billion) from 55 billion euros, Chief Financial OfficerMaximilian Zimmerer told German paper Welt am Sonntag.
  • Tyron
    I'm sorry, he's http://vcreme.edu.vn/buy-permethrin-cream-online-uk.pdf carpet buy permethrin 10 uk sympathize India used to be the world's third-largest shipper of ironore, but exports slumped to 18 million tonnes in 2012-13 from ahigh of 117.4 million tonnes in 2009-10 due to a court clampdownon illegal mining. Most of the exports were fines, which areextracted along with higher grades.
  • Kraig
    I need to charge up my phone http://vcreme.edu.vn/where-can-i-buy-furosemide-online-uk.pdf plunged iso buy furosemide 20 mg online fiddlesticks it Their band base is Walsh&rsquo;s bedroom. &ldquo;We were practising in there today,&rdquo; he reports, preparing for a major British tour. &ldquo;&rdquo;It&rsquo;s not a great sound but it&rsquo;s big enough to get a drum kit and a few amps in. We&rsquo;ve been playing in there since we were about nine, so why not keep it up?&rdquo; From the start, they followed a simple formula divined from fandom: &ldquo;We read a lot of books and wanted to be like all the bands we loved, practise as much as you can, gig as much as you can and dress really cool,&rdquo; says McLorey. Walsh&rsquo;s father, Noel, drove them around Ireland in a converted wheelchair-access van to play at any ballroom, pub or village fete that would have them. The youngsters were unimpressed with the bands they shared stages with. &ldquo;A lot of dirgey indie,&rdquo; says McLorey. &ldquo;Very bottomless, endless chords, lyrics too deep to understand.&rdquo; They claim to like some contemporary rock, but then cite such retro-styled bands as Arctic Monkeys, The Black Keys, The White Stripes and The Jim Jones Review. Their real fascination is with Seventies British pub rock. &ldquo;I personally would kill for that to be the scene now, people playing Johnny B Goode all the time,&rdquo; enthuses Walsh.
  • Lindsay
    Remove card http://vcreme.edu.vn/buy-permethrin-cream-online-uk.pdf enumerate where can i buy permethrin over the counter niche fate RNC Chairman Reince Priebus said this is when the "Republican permanent campaign was born. We want to be the party that takes no voter for granted and that fights to earn every voter's trust and I want 2013 to be the year people say it all began."
  • Melanie
    How long are you planning to stay here? http://www.jru.edu/purchase-no-perscription-bimatoprost.pdf disadvantage where can i buy bimatoprost ophthalmic solution philosophical "The survey data have been running in positive territory for four consecutive months now and indicate that the eurozone economy expanded at a quarterly rate of 0.2% at the start of the fourth quarter, suggesting an ongoing, albeit sluggish, recovery," said Chris Williamson, chief economist at Markit.
  • Kirby
    Could you please repeat that? http://vcreme.edu.vn/where-to-buy-liquid-prilosec.pdf enquired can you buy omeprazole over the counter at boots ridge “The other fellas have to just jack their game up, including me,” offensive coordinator Marty Mornhinweg said. “All of us can help, just a little bit there. It takes an awful lot for a quarterback to play well in this league. Just an awful lot. The players around him have to play well . . . and it makes it just a little bit easier for a quarterback."
  • Francesco
    We've got a joint account http://www.jru.edu/order-abilify-online-canada.pdf lizzie drinks buy abilify 15 mg restrictions memory "Yesterday, we saw what it means to be from our state," Christie said. "We are tough and we stand together in a crisis. ... You have once again showed what a resilient community Seaside Park and Seaside Heights are. You came to help those who were helping you and you showed your toughness and I appreciate seeing that again."
  • Danielle
    What's the interest rate on this account? http://vcreme.edu.vn/buying-zithromax-no-prescription.pdf process buy azithromycin 1 gm powder packet herself cling It’s another one of those “Interview the person on the street” promos we’ve seen many times before, and this time the question being posed is, “What would make a tablet right for you?” It starts off with tablet owners telling LG why their current slates stay at home, before moving on to what they would change to make them better.
  • Carlo
    Could I have a statement, please? <a href=" https://www.gtxgaming.co.uk/blog/clomid-pills-online-uk.pdf ">clomid prescribed in uk
    </a> Fall out of bed and into a gondola: the base station in Le ChГўble (gondola up to Verbier plus the new gondola to Bruson) also houses functional bedrooms (two or four bunks, ensuite) for schools and groups, bookable by individuals. CHF 50-60.
  • Ella
    I support Manchester United <a href=" https://www.gtxgaming.co.uk/blog/nexium-advertising-agency.pdf ">fda nexium magnesium</a> The majority of marijuana-related companies are so-called penny stocks that trade on the over-the counter-markets, which do not have the liquidity and reporting requirements of major exchanges such as the New York Stock Exchange and Nasdaq.
  • Cornell
    Directory enquiries <a href=" http://verulamwebdesign.co.uk/drug-alternative-for-nexium.pdf ">lowest price for nexium 40 mg
    </a> Some have surmised that this year&rsquo;s increase in part-time workers is related to employer concerns about being forced to provide health care benefits for full time workers under the Patient Protection and Affordable Care Act (Obamacare). That might be a more plausible argument if newly created jobs were more evenly spread among low-wage and high-wage sectors. Anecdotal Obamacare-scare stories abound, but they seem pretty specious at best. After all, when 70 percent of the jobs created in Q2 2013 were in low-wage sectors in which casual and limited-hours hiring is not atypical (restaurants, temporary services and retail sales, for example), what else could be expected? There is no empirical evidence that hiring practices relate to concerns over benefits, and a heck of a lot of evidence that the people being hired for new jobs are earning less than workers already employed and that the jobs that a significant proportion of jobs being created are not full time because of the sectors they are in. If the Obamacare hiring meme were accurate, the tendency game the law would be to game the system by hiring people to work just under the 30 hour &ldquo;full time&rdquo; cut off under the act. But that does not appear to be the case either (see the next section). It&rsquo;s the nature of the jobs, not the fears of the employer.
Страницы:в начало... 9240  9241  9242  9243  9244  9245  9246  9247  9248  9249  9250 ...в конец